Tastless Rape Jokes
[Nick Douglas = Adam/Elijah, ThreeTimeCommieWinner = CCG. Hez = Hez]
‹Nick Douglas› Rape can happen when you least expect it, like at your great uncle's nursing home Christmas party.
‹Nick Douglas› Which is why I'm not allowed at that nursing home any more.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› Rape can happen when you're just walking down the street.
‹Hez› that's probably for the best adam
‹Nick Douglas› Rape can happen when you're already having sex.
‹Nick Douglas› Hez, LOL, yeah
‹Hez› It can happen on a train, it can happen in the rain. It can happen when you're vain, it can happen when you're plain.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› hahaha
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› brilliant
‹Nick Douglas› Rape can happen in a house, it can happen with a mouse. Rape can happen here or there, rape can happen anywhere.
‹Hez› Wow, I think I just wrote "Rape For Kids"!
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› Rape can happen on a boat, rape can happen with a goat
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› Rape can sometimes get you laid, rape can even give you AIDS
‹Nick Douglas› Please hold, looking for the entire text of Green Eggs and Ham
‹Hez› It CAN'T happen with a mouse or a goat. Cheap rhymes don't cut it in the dog-eat-dog world of kid logic
‹Hez› I was making mine up off the dome
‹Hez› If you can't bring it, leave it on the curb for recycling.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› WTF? I rape goats all the time.
‹Nick Douglas› Goats are highly rapable.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› Mice, though, I agree that's ridiculous.
‹Nick Douglas› If I was in the audience of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, I would lie when they asked the audience.
‹Hez› Gawker. Home to goat rapers
‹Nick Douglas› You can rape a mouse.
‹Nick Douglas› Mice are surprisingly flexible
‹Hez› I would rape the audience of Who Wants to Be A Millionaire
‹Nick Douglas› I would rape Regis.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› I have friend who was the audience coordinator of that show.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› We could make it happen.
‹Nick Douglas› Wait, he isn't hosting that anymore. Now it's Meridith.
‹Nick Douglas› Tell your friend to just let me and my friends in. We're gonna make them lose.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› We'll just prop some chairs against the door and you can rape away.
‹Hez› I'm a pretty fast raper, they won't have to wait long
‹Nick Douglas› OMG THIS IS SERIOUSLY THE CORNIEST COMMERCIAL EVAR
‹Nick Douglas› Here, I'm going to transcribe it to you
‹Hez› i thought it was pretty clever, if a little rapey
‹Hez› oh, i thought you meant us
‹Nick Douglas› It's not quite the same without the terrible actors delivering their lines, but still.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› hahahha, pretty fast raper
‹Nick Douglas› K, picture a pretty lady and a handsome Hair Club For Men customer standing in a field in SLC.
‹Hez› it's so much better than IST
‹Nick Douglas› "Excuse me, ma'am, do you mind if we ask, what do you love?" "
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› rape!
‹Nick Douglas› "Oooh, I love... telling the same old stories with friends, spending time with family over the holidays, and when it comes to shopping, I LOVE a great deal."
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› who doesn't?!
‹Hez› And rape parties, like they used to do them in the olden days
‹Hez› rape doilies, rape dishes, everything was special
‹Nick Douglas› "Well, at Ashley home furniture stores, we love what you love. We love friends, we love holidays, and we love giving customers great deals!"
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› I'm wearing my Sunday rapiest
‹Hez› hahahahaha
‹Nick Douglas› This reminds me of that family guy episode where Lois looks in that hundred year old textbook and reads the chapter heading, "Negroes: America's Dancin'est Rape-Folk."
‹BS› now you sound like nick douglas
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› I really hope I get drunk enough to get raped tonight
‹BS› j/k
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› Maybe I'll just walk home
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› naked
‹Nick Douglas› ThreeTimeCommieWinne, But TTCW, don't you know? You don't have to get drunk to get raped!
‹Hez› Just go to that new bar, I think it's called The Rapery?
‹Nick Douglas› BS, no, it's true.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› WHAT?!
‹Nick Douglas› Hez, No, you're thinking of the Rapenasium.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› The Raper Room?
Nick Douglas› Or is that the Rapeateria?
‹BS› this is the funniest stuff i have ever read in my life i hope someone is writing all this down
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› Datrapia?
‹Nick Douglas› LOL
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› Date rape can be nice too.
‹Nick Douglas› Is there any other kind??
ThreeTimeCommieWinne› Rapey's Watering Hole
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› McRapeins
‹Nick Douglas› Rapin' Larry's Family Rape Jamboree
‹Hez› HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH McRapeins!!!!!!!!!
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› O'Rapeys
‹Hez› Rapetorium
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› The Rapegoat
‹Nick Douglas› Rapin' Beatrice's Quick Draw Saloon
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› Be sure to order a rapetini!
‹Nick Douglas› I prefer the rapemopolitan
‹Nick Douglas› Or the Mohirape.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› How about a margarapea?
‹Hez› I hear there's a new industrial place opening called R4P3
‹Nick Douglas› ThreeTimeCommieWinne, I'll just take a shot of gRape Pucker
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› or a Nonconsensual Sex on the Beach
‹Nick Douglas› ThreeTimeCommieWinne, OMG, LOL
‹Hez› Omg, my favourite bar - change a few letters: The Rapeway Club
* Binky joins Main room
‹Hez› Binky, jesus we had to start the rape party without you!
‹Nick Douglas› Nonconsensual Sex on the Beach wins the commie
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› You don't even have to change the name of the "Screaming Orgasm"
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› YES!
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› My fourth commie!
‹Binky› Guess so!
‹Hez› Hey, this is my chatroom I say who wins the commies, and so far I am in the lead
‹Nick Douglas› Hez, Just hand them out, Oprah style. You get a commie! And you get a commie!
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› fuck you Hez
‹Hez› actually no, I am just going to keep them all and give each of you a coupon for a free rape
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› you're still on rape-y bar names
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› we're in the new world of rape cocktails
‹Nick Douglas› I'll just have a Rum and Rape, please
‹Hez› How about a shot bar called Roofies & Rapes!
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› straight up
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› rape
‹Nick Douglas› Or Rape and Coke
‹Nick Douglas› Rape on the rocks
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› Coyote Roofie
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› Just a twist of rape for me
‹Hez› I don't want regular bar rape, I want premium rape, please
‹Nick Douglas› Top shelf rape
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› haha
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› top shelf rape
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› oh damn
‹Nick Douglas› Ha! You just lost a commie/
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› I always go for the cheap rape so I can order more
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› it all tastes the same to me
‹Hez› a pitcher of rape!
‹Nick Douglas› Cheap rape gets you there quicker, cheaper
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› I don't know, do you think there will be enough rape to go around?\
‹Hez› and a whole bunch of dirty glasses
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› maybe we should order two pitchers
‹Hez› we can always order more rape
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› I hate to run out
‹Hez› THIS RAPE IS FLAT! Waitress?!!
‹Nick Douglas› Oh, fuck you, TTCW.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› wait, what?
‹Nick Douglas› Oh, I thought you were leaving.
‹Nick Douglas› NM.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› haha
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› I hate to run out
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› OF RAPE
‹Nick Douglas› Where is binky?
‹Hez› No love for THIS RAPE IS FLAT!? What are you people, made of rape?
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› I just had 10,000 rape babies.
‹Nick Douglas› ThreeTimeCommieWinne, What a coincidence. I just raped 10,000 babies.
‹ThreeTimeCommieWinne› This is my favorite conversation ever.
Jan 25th