cvxn

I'm Hez. please enjoy my internets!
@Hez on twitter | cvxn on instagram/statigram
stuff I've written for HelloGiggles is here
contact me here or just ask me anything

edwardspoonhands:

First, I love Tumblr and want to keep loving it. And yes, it is immediately terrifying to hear that Yahoo (which, from a lot of our perspectives, is a laughably backwards and culturally irrelevant company) is going to own Tumblr. I sympathize.

But there are a number of circumstances in which…

I guess I pretty much concur with this. It may be relevant to your interests too, fellow Tumblr user.

(Source: thegestianpoet)

This is great.

wilwheaton:

lunapics:

spastasmagoria:

tseecka:

samandriel:

dajo42:

“Can I touch your butt” in Elvish.

This is so useful

No, this is not “Can I touch your butt” in Elvish. This is “Can I touch your butt?” in English, transcribed using the letters of the Elvish alphabet. There is a difference. 
In Elvish, the letters of the alphabet correspond to sounds, not to words. The above text spells it out using one symbol to represent one letter of the original English, which is incorrect:
c-a-n  i  t-o-u-c-h  y-o-u-r  b-u-t-t
If you really want to spell out an English phrase using the Elvish alphabet, you would do so phonetically, which would basically equate to one symbol per phoneme (sound):
c-a-n  a-i  t-u-ch  y-o-r  b-u-t
If you actually wanted to write “Can I touch your butt?” in Elvish, one (very rough) translation would be:

Annog nin daf pladan tele ci?

Which, in Sindarin Elvish, roughly translates to, “Would you give me permission to touch your rear?”
Written in tengwar (the Elvish alphabet), it would look like this:

Sorry for the blurry quality.

There is no nerdcore like the Tumblr nerdcore. Only here would a grammar and linguistics argument involve Tolkien and butts.


BUTTS.

wilwheaton:

lunapics:

spastasmagoria:

tseecka:

samandriel:

dajo42:

“Can I touch your butt” in Elvish.

This is so useful

No, this is not “Can I touch your butt” in Elvish. This is “Can I touch your butt?” in English, transcribed using the letters of the Elvish alphabet. There is a difference. 

In Elvish, the letters of the alphabet correspond to sounds, not to words. The above text spells it out using one symbol to represent one letter of the original English, which is incorrect:

  • c-a-n  i  t-o-u-c-h  y-o-u-r  b-u-t-t

If you really want to spell out an English phrase using the Elvish alphabet, you would do so phonetically, which would basically equate to one symbol per phoneme (sound):

  • c-a-n  a-i  t-u-ch  y-o-r  b-u-t

If you actually wanted to write “Can I touch your butt?” in Elvish, one (very rough) translation would be:

  • Annog nin daf pladan tele ci?

Which, in Sindarin Elvish, roughly translates to, “Would you give me permission to touch your rear?”

Written in tengwar (the Elvish alphabet), it would look like this:

image

Sorry for the blurry quality.

There is no nerdcore like the Tumblr nerdcore. Only here would a grammar and linguistics argument involve Tolkien and butts.

BUTTS.

Yesterday was my 5 year anniversary on Tumblr!

What, no gluten-free cake?

bryan:

  • Swipe right to pop back to the previous view
  • Pan across GIFs to animate them frame-by-frame
  • Slide the compose button up to create a photo post
  • Slide the compose button to the left to create a text post
  • Long-press a post’s reblog button to perform a “fast reblog”
  • Long-press a…

TMYK

wilwheaton:

karenhallion:

The official Doctor Who Tumblr reblogged my art! Unfortunately, my name is no where to be found…but cool none-the-less!

doctorwho:

Doctor Who x Disney Crossover fanart

Come on, Doctor Who Tumblr! Credit the artist! You can do it!!

(Source: society6.com)

A single-serving Tumblr I just started where I’ll attempt to feature a new Malcolm Tucker insult every day.

Pfft… Who says I don’t like anything?
(FYI #26,000 was this one)

Pfft… Who says I don’t like anything?

(FYI #26,000 was this one)

wilwheaton:

election:

Other things you could have done in the time it took Clinton to deliver his speech:
Walk from one side of Charlotte to the other
Get through half a game of Settlers of Catan
Microwave and eat a pack of hotdogs, one at a time
Metabolize one beer
Get halfway through a sleep cycle
Read 12 pages of Proust
Watch Gangnam Style 11 times
Learn esperanto
- Jason

Because reading 12 pages of Proust is so much more important than understanding how badly the GOP has fucked the country, and how hard Obama is working to unfuck it in the face of unified GOP opposition in both at every level of government.
Jesus Christ, media. If you spent as much time informing people about things that matter as you do on pointless shit like this and reality TV, we’d probably have a working, functioning democracy in America.

I’m with Wheaton. Whoever this “Jason” fool is, maybe he should be doing all these aforementioned “other things” rather than trying to write “informative” blog posts for Tumblr’s Election blog. 
Dude, srsly. This was kind of insulting.

wilwheaton:

election:

Other things you could have done in the time it took Clinton to deliver his speech:

  • Walk from one side of Charlotte to the other
  • Get through half a game of Settlers of Catan
  • Microwave and eat a pack of hotdogs, one at a time
  • Metabolize one beer
  • Get halfway through a sleep cycle
  • Read 12 pages of Proust
  • Watch Gangnam Style 11 times
  • Learn esperanto

- Jason

Because reading 12 pages of Proust is so much more important than understanding how badly the GOP has fucked the country, and how hard Obama is working to unfuck it in the face of unified GOP opposition in both at every level of government.

Jesus Christ, media. If you spent as much time informing people about things that matter as you do on pointless shit like this and reality TV, we’d probably have a working, functioning democracy in America.

I’m with Wheaton. Whoever this “Jason” fool is, maybe he should be doing all these aforementioned “other things” rather than trying to write “informative” blog posts for Tumblr’s Election blog. 

Dude, srsly. This was kind of insulting.

PLEASE TUMBLR,

TELL ME MORE ABOUT EVERY SINGLE MICROSECOND THAT HAPPENED ON BREAKING BAD LAST NIGHT!

BECAUSE OF COURSE EVERYBODY ONLY EVER CONSUMES THE SAME CULTURE THAT YOU DO AT THE SAME TIME!

Yeah, I’m sure it’s a perfect show (that I will certainly enjoy in the not-too-distant-future, when you’ve all stopped collectively soiling your Huggies over it), but I am so damn glad to be out of that fucking undertow for yet another season.

Just adding a little extension, and who should I spot in the screenshot but my pal Travors! U R SO FAMUSS!
UPDATE: “Please don’t download this or our lawyers won’t let us host audio” is the hidden message in the non-functioning download link.
OH TUMBLR, Y U SO CRAZY?

Just adding a little extension, and who should I spot in the screenshot but my pal Travors! U R SO FAMUSS!

UPDATE: “Please don’t download this or our lawyers won’t let us host audio” is the hidden message in the non-functioning download link.

OH TUMBLR, Y U SO CRAZY?

Excited to try a not-busted-crap version of Tumblr for Android!

Look forward to actually being able to get a heart on for your posts today while I’m TGIFing.

Yup. Definitely struck a nerve.

(And yes, I am aware that by bitching about this I’ve probably screwed myself out of any potential Tumblr writing gig. But hey, I alienate more potential employers by noon than most of people do all day!)

Guess I struck a nerve.

Guess I struck a nerve.

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