A for real thing I just had to post on FB after some hypercommenty guy who works at my bar brought the phrase “closet gimp” into a post about the NHL lockout.
Why do some dudes have to get their skeeziness on EVERYTHING?
TELL ME MORE ABOUT EVERY SINGLE MICROSECOND THAT HAPPENED ON BREAKING BAD LAST NIGHT!
BECAUSE OF COURSE EVERYBODY ONLY EVER CONSUMES THE SAME CULTURE THAT YOU DO AT THE SAME TIME!
Yeah, I’m sure it’s a perfect show (that I will certainly enjoy in the not-too-distant-future, when you’ve all stopped collectively soiling your Huggies over it), but I am so damn glad to be out of that fucking undertow for yet another season.
I grow fatigued of looking at otherwise pretty people with cancer in their faces.
I follow you already, so I promise I will read your posts (and watch your GLORIOUS basset hound videos) anyway. Please stop “paying to pin”. If no one does it, it will go away.
PS: Hey Mohney, remember when you said your team was going to hire some writers? That’s what you should be pinning to everyone’s dash. Pin to pay.
PPS: As irritated as I am, I’m not unfollowing. THIS TOO SHALL PASS.
PPPS: I STILL LOVE YOU ALL.
Just. Please. Fucking. Stop.
I don’t care if she’s a slut or an angel… you line her pockets and pave the way for all her next famewhoring moves with your recaps and reblogs, and I am genuinely sad that some intelligent women I follow think that’s not a big deal. Unlike some of you, I’ve never found it the least bit “funny” to comment and coo about her “sassy, incorrigible antics.” I can’t just remove my brain and pretend that she’s actually SO RAVEN that she merits any more than an item on TMZ.
Now that the curtain has been fully pulled back on how much she made for that preposterous exercise in nuptial mockery, can we adults take a little disco nap from being forced to endure her family’s atrociously venal moneygrabs?
If my response to every long-winded statement you make is to feign agreement with a wide-eyed “well, there you go,” I am probably so bored and uncomfortably trapped by the conversation you are forcing upon me, I am contemplating eating my own face to escape.
Was making my FB friends think that by saying ‘yes’ to their ‘friendship,’ I actually have even the slightest fucking interest in yet ANOTHER rockabilly/burlesque/tattoo show.
Fuck you, Satan.
about my roommate’s device driver problems with her PC.
I just widen my eyes and shrug in the direction of my MacBook.
I’m going to let you guess whether or not that (or my initial reply, “Get a Mac,”) has dissuaded her from continuing to ask me what she should do to make it stop crashing.
UPDATE: This was posted mere moments before the great Tumblr Outage of 5/9/11, which I now fear I caused with my bad juju. Sorry, errybody.
Please everybody, do not refer to CNN, or most American news networks for accurate updates on the development of the situation here. I would suggest Japan’s NHK news network.
Most news networks keep running the same 4 or 5 extreme damage loops focusing on the body count and tragedy. Those are valid points as well, but to repeat them with music and logos is sickening, and now Japan has become the lead star in American news network Natural Disaster Series.
There are also positive developments that keep hope and humanity alive and together. I know everybody loves to hear “the end is near!” And the news media is the food for more subconscious hunger for catastrophe, so we can all witness something that makes history, but in the end it will be just another 24 hour programming run to sell advertising for mortgage refinancing and arthritis medication.
Japan and its people are competent and caring individuals. Restoring order is what they are the best at. I feel most at ease knowing that the professionals and technicians involved are determined with a samurai spirit to manage the disaster at hand.
This life is as real as you want it to be, and it’s worth as much as you are. Enjoy your time in this body, on this planet, that’s all you have!
— Rikki Kasso, Tokyo Undressed
You’re here, you’re wet, and believe me, we’re all so used to it our feet are now webbed.
Please go away… or turn into frequent flyer points so that I can.